June 1, 2008

Demi Moore:

Sagging Breast – Check
Flabby Arms – Check
Double Chin – Check
Growing Waist – Check

$500,000 worth of plastic surgery all in vain now isn’t it?

Ashton Kutcher:

Pubic-like Facial Hair – Check
Gained A Whole Lot Of Weight – Check
Looks Annoying As Usual – Check
Milf Hunter – Check

Not a MILF now is she. Well maybe if it becomes Mothers I Like To Fist

(Image: DListed)

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Hollywood actor Ashton Kutcher says he is considering a career in porn films because he thinks people starring in such movies are more popular.

Kutcher jokingly said that he envies porn star Jenna Jameson.
Kutcher, who has just finished working on a sex comedy, said, “I made a sort of a porno-pseudo-comedy movie. So maybe I’ll do some more porno. It worked for Jenna Jameson.”

He added, “I was actually in London last week and they knew who Ron Jeremy was. He’s a famous porn star in London as well. I didn’t realise that porn stars were famous in other countries. I thought London had their own. Apparently, they don’t. I think we have, as a country, kind of a corner on that market. So I was thinking about venturing that way a little further.”

we all know HE WANTS TO BE IN A PORN MOVIE, because he is sick and tired of DEMI MOORE’S SAGGY VAGINA


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May 3, 2008

Cameron Diaz was all smiles on her first ever premiere to What Happens In Vegas after the tragic death of her father.

Here, she is posing with that annoying boy who looks good with his mouth shut, Ashton.

(Image: Pop Sugar)

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April 29, 2008

The What Happens in Vegas star wants you to know that he’s not perfect. He was on the Friday Night with Jonathan Ross talk show on the BBC when he decided to take off his shoes to reveal to the host that his feet were slightly webbed. Just before he decided to whip out his tootsies, he said, “When everything else is so good-looking, something has to give.”

Yeah, your sense of humour. Totally crass. Demi Moore worships those hideous looking feet though. (No, we will spare you the closeup pictures).

(Image: A Socialite’s Life)

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April 16, 2008

“I was 15. It was out in the woods with a girl I had just met who my buddy set me up with. The whole thing lasted two seconds. It was really awkward. Two years later I had sex with her again just to show her the first performance was a fluke and I’d gotten better.” – Ashton Kutcher

The girl is definitely not Demi Moore. She could have been charged then for having sex with a minor. Oh wait, she STILL can be chraged for fucking a minor.

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Hocus Pocus.

Yes, Demi Moore covers herself in blood-sucking leeches to keep her skin lookingfresh.The actress – who, at 45, is 15 years older than husband Ashton Kutcher – isa huge fan of a detox treatment which involves the unpleasant creaturesbeing placed on her body.

She said: “I feel like I’ve always been someone looking for the cutting edgeof things that optimize your health and healing.”

After that , she uses the black leeches to cast a spell on Ashton, so that he could love her saggy vagina.

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Kinda Hot. Kinda.

March 18, 2008

Ashton Kutcher did a robot-themed photoshoot for VMan and we must say that a lot of stuffing was used. And we hate ourselves for admitting this but he looks kinda hot. Kinda.

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